Weeks had gone by and the pain in my chest was a constant reminder that Aulad was still gone. Therapy kept me sane and able to maintain somewhat of a normal lifestyle and the lullabies continued to comfort me at night, but only on my worst days. I had invested a good twenty dollars in the sleep aid stock, for it became my only solace in life and Kara and I were rarely speaking, although we saw each other every day. The world continue to go on around me while I was stuck in what seemed like a period of blue, but today I had enough of not doing anything about it. It was plain to see that everything that I ever believed in when it came to the dead was a lie. They didn’t come back to visit you or move things around to let you know that they where still there, nor did they reveal any symbols of numbers and such foolish things. They just didn’t come back, at least not on their own.
I pulled a couple of plain white unscented candles and the brown box with black lettering that read Ouija from the shopping bag. I knew there was a chance that this simple board and planchette would prove to be a horrible idea, none the less I was willing to try anything at this point. I wasted no time getting situated and comfortable, I was eager to begin the séance. After all of the candles were lit and placed around me in a circle and the board was set up, I took a deep breath.
“Okay Aulad, if you can hear me, use the planchette to communicate with me, you know how this works.”
There was a deafening silence and there was no movement. I sat there a while longer thinking of anything that I may have forgotten to invoke Aulad’s spirit but I couldn’t think of anything. I had the Ouija board, the candles, his things. . . hmph.
“Aulad, I just want to know that you’re safe. It’s been so hard living on like– This wasn’t suppose to happen! It was supposed to be me and you Aulad!” I yelled throwing the planchette against the wall and pushing away the board. “Why?” I began to sob. “Why did you take him from me? I loved him! We where suppose to get married! Have children, be a family!”
I sat there holding myself crying and cursing my God and his God, there was no fairness in this. How was this right? He had a future ahead of him! I bolted up in desperation to hear that lullaby once more. I stormed into my bathroom and stopped abruptly. Where where they? Where in the hell where my pills? I began to search my tiny bedroom like a mad woman tossing things about and throwing things letting them fall wherever they landed.
“She has no right taking my pills! She knows they help me sleep! So what if I’m sleeping a lot, if she lost Kevin how would she feel?”
I remembered the new bottle I had just purchased. I stormed back into the bedroom tripping over my own feet to get to the shopping bag that I’d tossed aside. I took the new bottle of pills into the bathroom with me and clumsily dumped half the bottle into my hand not caring that I had spilled quite a few onto the floor.
Suddenly there was a loud thud, like something hit the floor in my bedroom. I scanned the room for what could have made that sound, especially since Kara was working late tonight. I searched the room until I came across the Ouija board and the planchette together. I gasped when I walked up to it and the planchette pointed to, “No”. Still clutching the pills in my hand, I went back into the bathroom and put them back into the bottle, all except what had scattered onto the floor. When I walked back into the bedroom the planchette was now on the letter A. I stared at the board in silence and the planchette moved from the A, to the U, to the L, back up to A and then on to the D. I wrapped my arms around my shivering body, not in fear but from a cold electricity feeling.
“Aulad?” I whispered barely audible.
I quietly dropped down to my knees in front of the Oujia board with my arms still wrapped around me.
“Aulad!” I said more forcefully.
I watched the planchette swing to the “Yes” on the board. I wiped tears from my eyes and smiled for the first time in weeks.
“Can you show yourself to me?” I asked eager to communicate with him.
I watched and waited for the planchette to move but nothing happened.
“Please?” I begged.
I knew I was hearing him in my sleep, I thought as I waited. I sat and waited for Aulad to appear for what seemed like forever. I began to cry silently at the thought of maybe I was going crazy and maybe my mind was playing tricks on me making me believe that this really was Aulad. I truly did miss him.
“You know, you’re going to have to stop crying over me at some point.”
My eyes widen at the sound of his raspy voice. I whipped my head around to see a smiling Aulad with a hint of transparency to his body.
“Aulad! Aulad, it’s you!” I cried out not believing what I was seeing. “H-how is this possible? Is it really you?”
Aulad looked sad for a moment but then his expression changed into a sly grin.
“Yeah, you know except for the whole me being a spirit and all . . .”
“Why didn’t you come to me when I asked you?” I demanded louder than I wanted it to sound.
“You know Lici, getting here is not as easy as walking down the street and knocking on your door–”
It was him!
“It is you!” I said rising up to hug him but I stopped short. “Can I?” I asked.
“I don’t know I’ve never been dead before, but I will say, that this door is pretty hard behind me, I would hate it if you–”
In blind faith I threw my body onto his and felt his touch. I felt Aulad’s arms wrap themselves around me. His touch was an odd mixture of warmth and coldness along with static electricity. I nuzzled my head in his chest and tried to breath in his scent but there was no scent.
“How did you get here? Where are you? I mean are you in paradise or. . .” I asked letting my voice trail off.
“I don’t know. The last thing I remember is being home, going to sleep, darkness and . . . my funeral, than watching you for a couple of days, then nothing and. . . then I came back when you called out to me.”
“So it did work?”
“Yeah something like that, I had a choice, and I chose you.”
“Between Heaven and Hell?” I gasped.
Aulad chuckled, “No, I don’t think I made it that far, the dimensions are indefinite. So there’s a reason why people don’t know what’s on the other side after life. I still don’t. But enough of that, I’m here now.”
“For how long?” I wondered out loud.
I felt a quick rise up and down in Aulad’s shoulders as if he was shrugging.
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